How Acupuncture Helps With Existential Crises, Trauma, and Anxiety

"The largest part of what we call 'personality' is determined by how we've opted to defend ourselves against anxiety and sadness." ~ Alain de Botton

One of the first things we learn in Acupuncture school is the TCM theory of the soul. 

They say the soul has 3 parts: Hun, Po, and Shen.  

Our Hun, the thing that is "us" that continues after our body expires, is located in the Liver. 

The Po is in the Lungs. That's the part of the soul responsible for feelings, pain, and memory. 

The Shen is the part that we mostly deal with in medicine:  it's the overall consciousness. It shows your mental clarity. It's stored in your Heart. 

You can assess someone's Shen by looking into their eyes. 

Clear eyes with a sparkle? Good Shen. Also, good indication for healing. 

Dull, downcast eyes, or nervous, darting eyes? Not a good prognosis. 

I thought it was fascinating, how I was there to study healthcare, and one of the first things they taught was about spiritual health. 

Well, it makes sense, right?  

If you're not OK emotionally or spiritually, you probably won't be OK physically, either. 

The Body Keeps the Score. 

I haven't read that book, but I get the concept. How we feel NOW rarely links up exactly with what's going on right now. It has more to do with what's happened in the past. 

I was a very anxious person as a young adult. And I struggled with bouts of depression since I was a pre-teen. Fortunately, I've learned tools that help. Now, when I feel those old, familiar sensations creeping in, I know what to do to prevent it from spiraling out of control. Also fortunately, I rarely feel anxious or depressed anymore. 

This invisible dialogue within our body, between our "souls," determines how we show up in the world. The hobbies we like. The job we do. The effort we put into relationships. How well we sleep at night. 

We're all born with different souls - different interests, purposes, sensitivities. Then, we're all put into slightly - or sometimes radically - different environments.

Even siblings may be born under drastically different situations.

A book I did read was Scattered Minds by Dr. Gabor Mate. He was born in Hungary during WWII. His mother was under constant fear of being taken by the Nazis. A lot of their family already was. 

Contrast that to his younger siblings, who grew up in Canada, in a decidedly more relaxed environment.

Gabor ended up with ADHD. His siblings did not. 

That lead his research into why some people have this condition (ADD/ADHD), and others don't.

His theory is that it's not due to a physical anomaly.  He believes it's from unaddressed stress and anxiety from childhood.  When the main nurturer is - for whatever reason - not able to fully ease a baby or toddler's anxieties.

It's "Attachment Theory," in essence. The idea is this is the blueprint for all your future relationships.

When I was an undergrad at UT, for a Child Development class, I helped score these research tapes on attachment theory. I watched how a toddler and their parents interacted. The test was: a kid plays in a room with their parents, the parents leave the room for a minute, then they return. 

The 3 attachment "styles" are 

* Secure - (the ideal situation) - the child feels certain the parents will return. They don't seem overly anxious, but do, for example, maybe cry a little when the parents leave, or check the door, watching for their eventual return. They're thrilled when they do, then go back to playing. 

* Anxious - the infant doesn't want them to leave. They may throw a fit. Lots of crying and fretting. They're mad or clingy when the parents return. Or avoid them. Or a mix of all of those things. 

* Avoidant - the toddler doesn't appear to care one way or another if the parent stays or goes. The parents leave - they continue playing. They may glance up, but don't react strongly, even when the parents return. 

Funny enough, I never thought about my own attachment style to my parents while doing this study. But now, I'm almost certain I was not securely attached. 

And after reading this book, I'm also wondering, do I have ADHD? I read it because I'm fairly certain my daughter has it. I was going through a very stressful time right after she was born. When she was 4, I finally got the divorce that needed to happen. 

There are no blood tests or scans that can prove someone does, indeed, have ADD / ADHD.  

Really, they're very common symptoms. Things a lot of us get. Things almost everyone has had at one time or another at least. 

• Higher degree of environmental sensitivity  
• Distractability
• Anxiety
• Addictions, possibly (Dopamine-chasing)
• Low self-esteem 
• Forgetfulness
• Careless mistakes
• Not paying attention
• Losing things
• Restlessness (with Hyperactivity)
• Interrupting (with Hyperactivity) 

The younger you are when the trauma happened, the more it impacts you. The more severe the trauma was, the more it will impact you. 

Impact of Trauma

Trauma comes in all sorts of packages. War, witnessing violence, being attacked, accidents, and natural disasters. 

There's also the daily trauma of being in an unsupportive or abusive relationship.

Being ignored by your primary caretaker is traumatic. 

Being poor or hungry is traumatic.

The more trauma we've had, the worse we handle the smaller, daily stresses that are part of life. 

Any trauma, according to TCM theory, creates a "Cold energy" in the body.  Trauma can impact your Shen, which could impact your major organs:  Heart, Liver, and Lungs. 

Unresolved Cold Damage can lead to Stagnation (think: frozen water/ice). Stagnation builds up heat (think: friction or an engine that needs oil) which can lead to Fire.  This can lead to having Cold and Hot "Evil Qi" at the same time. 

COLD ➡️ STAGNATION ➡️ FIRE 

The treatment is finding where the Cold Damage is stuck, and resolving it. This is why we use Moxa. Many people ask, "What is it? What does it do?" The answer: it unblocks your Yang Qi. The warm Yang Qi gets rid of the Cold. 

Heart Shen

Heart imbalances in TCM almost always include palpitations (sudden, unexpected changes in heart rate), pressure in the chest, and insomnia.  

Several things could cause Heart problems: 

* Dan Tian imbalance - read more on the Dan Tian here; it's closely tied in with anxiety. 

* Cold damage - from improper diet (too much cold and raw food and drinks), or from trauma.

* Phlegm - a combination of Cold & Water/Fluid build-up, Stagnation, and Shen disturbance.

* Qi and Blood deficiency - kind of like anemia, but doesn't always confirm with blood tests. Will happen with dizziness, fatigue, and a pale tongue.

We, as Acupuncturists, diagnose what's causing the Heart imbalance, and treat with the appropriate Acupuncture technique and points. (Something dry needling can't do!)

The needle retention time is to restore natural balance. To help you feel more like YOU. The more you can relax into it, and accept the changes offered, the better the outcome. 

What To Do

If you're having panic attacks, unrelenting anxiety, ADD/ADHD symptoms, or heart issues, there are positive steps you can take to feel better more often. 

First of all, breathe. 

I know, it's said all the time, so it sounds trite. It seems too easy to be true. But it works. Inhale to a count of 4, then exhale for 4.

Try to focus on the breath, and let the thoughts go. They're only thoughts!  Most of what we think is real, are actually just stories we tell ourselves. They're not necessarily facts. 

For example, you may tell yourself, "this person hates me." Unless they've told you in so many words, chances are, it's just not true. Other options include: they hate themselves; they're having a bad day; or they're distracted or busy. 

The process of "letting go" is the best.

First, letting go of the fear of death is helpful. I'm not saying, do dangerous things, or that life isn't valuable - it is.

But, coming to terms with our own mortality is important. Because underlying a lot of anxiety is that we know, deep down, this won't last forever. We're afraid of doing it wrong, or not doing enough. We're afraid of pain. 

Confronting is healing because it turns something scary (the unknown! 👻🤡😈☠️) into something you can visualize, wrap your head around. When I say "confront" death - I mean in your mind only. Most people won't do this because it is uncomfortable. Keep in mind, that the discomfort is only temporary.

Always come back to your breath. That's the link between your soul and your body.  

Life IS but a dream. When you have a deeper realization that this is temporary, and you are eternal, life is more fun. It's a short play, in the long run. I like the saying "live like you're dreaming and dream like it's real." 

Dr. Mate suggests the key to living with ADD/ADHD is to parent yourself.

Once you're an adult, that's the only option. His suggestions:

* Accept yourself, unconditionally.

Guilt comes hand in hand with people-pleasing. However, guilt is a great teacher. Instead of trying to not feel it, analyze the message that came with it. WHY do you feel this way? What happened? Can you just forgive yourself? Can you look at it differently? Is there anything else that can be done? If not, can you let it go? When I started doing this, I slept so much better at night. 

* Pay attention.

If you have ADD/ADHD this is challenging, but really, there are things you can do.

For example, with my daughter, when she wants to do something with me, I almost always say "yes." When she talks to me, I set down what I'm doing, close the laptop or whatever, and look at her with my full attention. It's the best thing you can do for a child or person who has an attention disorder.  

* Set small goals.

You don't need to be "cured," you need incremental updates. I like to joke that I help people get "healthier, slowly, over a long period of time." Each treatment, a little bit better.  Each day, set a little goal for yourself. Like, you'll start planning what's for dinner ahead of time. Or you'll start writing a to-do list for the next day before you go to bed.   

* Ask for help. 

Maybe the goal is to set up an appointment with a qualified and recommended counselor or psychologist. Or an Acupuncturist!  Build your Healthcare Team!  A group of qualified individuals who are there to support and guide you. 

Good friends, neighbors, and family members are great resources for finding what and who you need. 

* Prioritize good nutrition.

Sugar, for my ADD child, is a nightmare. Those crashes, yo. It's scary! Taking time to plan what you'll make for dinner, for example, is time well-spent. Here's my cookbook if you need ideas of what to make. 

* Have good sleep hygeine.

No phones and laptops near the bed. I'd avoid them for at least an hour or 2 before bedtime. Aim for no later than 10 pm bedtime if possible. The most restorative sleep time for mental health is between 11 pm and 3 am (hours of the Gall Bladder and Liver). 

* Exercise.

Movement is essential for getting out of your head. It helps with releasing tension. It give you feel-good hormones. Your workout doesn't need to be grueling. A simple walk around the block or some stretching does the trick just as well as a HIIT class. 

* Be in nature.

Touch grass, as the kids say. The closer we get to nature, the better we feel - in general. 

* Have fun.

Last night I was talking to another mom after our kids' orchestra performance. I asked her how she was and she sighed. She's finishing grad school, graduating in 9 days, is a single mom of 4, and works full time. I patted her on the back. "You got this." She said she'll have a whole month off once school's out, including all the kids will be out of town.

I said, "Go have fun!" She gave me a look. "I don't think I'll want to do anything!" I know what she means. But also, "having fun" means recreation. Relaxation. Doing whatever the F- YOU WANT TO DO!  

Rarely does "doing nothing" make us feel better. Especially if that "nothing" means scrolling Instagram for 3 hours, or streaming endless episodes of dumb shows. 

In other words - get a hobby. Lounge by a pool. Make art. Write. Take an archery class. Go see a movie. Plan a potluck dinner party. What turns you on? Do it! 

* Meditate.

Focusing on your breath alone, letting the thoughts go, is the best. People say "I can't..." or they hate it. It's the same if you've never really exercised before. Yes, it's hard to get started. But once you do, you'll know it works.

All those thoughts making you insane? What if they just ... disappeared?! How? "Acknowledge them. Then, watch them drift away." If they come back, repeat.

Often I'm surprised at how inconsequential those seemingly important thoughts really are, once I'm done. It doesn't happen consciously. What will happen - ideally - is once those monkey-mind thoughts finally leave, you're left with a sense of peace. Because, really, everything will be alright. Maybe it's not alright right now, but it will be. Trust. 

I'm going to add in my own insight - 

* Psychedelics?

I've taken my share of "shamanic journeys," and felt the various ups and downs associated with doing these without medical supervision. Meaning, yes, I've had "bad trips" before. That being said, maybe if you're new to psychedelics, do with supervision?

But it's those so-called "bad trips" or maybe "intense trips" is more like it - where I've learned the most.

What I always come away with is, your breath will connect you with life. Keep it steady and pay attention to it. If you're still in your body, you have a purpose here, on earth. Find out what it is and do that thing. Feeling important trumps anxiety. It helps you be more responsible. It helps you be more kind. It centers your Heart.